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We Were Once Happy

Does the following ‘nutshell’ describe any of your relationships?

We were engaged. As the days and months went by our passion increased and we fell deeper and deeper into the abyss of the everlasting love. We always found ways to fulfill each other’s joys and needs.

Amazing how events can alter such state and even turn it into the abyss of confusion.

After marriage we started facing real life and the challenges became storms with no end in sight.

Both of us are stubborn when it comes to our views. We hold on tight to our stories and think that the other cannot possibly understand “what I need”. It was never like that when we were engaged. So we insist and insist until we can’t stand each other.

What could make a loving relationship become a confused relationship, shifting between madly in love to can’t stand each other, with a hint of hatred?

Comments (8)

Relationships are never easy and take lots of work.
    True Michael, relationships are built on hard work and courage to face challenges. Thank you!
sometimes we fall for someone and forget to discuss what we both want from the future. Then the future comes and we are confused that our partner is not on board with us automatically. sadly we think love is enough, but it;s not
    Jaqui, one of the most important things before marriage is to discuss our similarities and differences. As we are clear about our goals, we must be clear about our mates goals as well. Our similarities will help us succeed. Great insight!
i think being complacent and angora in a relationship can spoil the bonding
    Bonding happens when we validate our similarities and acknowledge our differences. Each one should be true to oneself and to be loved for who they are not for what they are expected to do. Thank you Amar for your comment :)
We are forever growing and changing. I believe that if we at not aware of the changes that are happening to each other then we can get to a place where we no longer know each other. Communication is vital, not just daily communication but real in depth conversations, getting to know each other more. If we are not seeing the growth of each other then one day we can wake up and not know each other any more. Sometimes we grow in different directions and that is OK as long as we are able to acknowledge that and either move on or start bonding again.
    Kama, your comment reflects a major issue that happens with many of my clients. It's crucial to continue bonding every step of the way. It's also extremely important for each one to respect the growth process and accomplishments of the other. Great insights! Thank you!

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