Do you get mad when your fiancé takes a peak at other women? Do you feel jealous and confront him?
One client called me on the phone huffing and puffing through the receiver that I couldn’t understand all her words. After calming her down she went on:
“We went to this really fancy restaurant to have a nice quiet dinner, and his eyes were not on me but on every beautiful woman who came in!” She panted. “He says he loves me but his action doesn’t prove it!” She started crying and it shows that she was emotionally shaken up by the message he’s giving her. She confronted him and he tried to defend himself by saying it is natural and normal for a man to look at other women. She did not buy his argument and continued, “You proposed and made a decision to build a family. This behavior will not work with me!” and dashed out of the restaurant without a word.
Reading many reports about this habit, there were two different views:
1It is natural for a man to look at other women since men are stimulated visually. It’s part of their primitive nature to search and scan as many qualified females as possible to ensure that their offspring survives.
2Even though they are stimulated visually but a man who loves and respects his mate would not scan other women.
One disturbing article I read on a website, actually encouraged men to look and find excuses to prolong the look if they got caught! This type of advice is very demeaning for women and for the one he chose to be his mate. The author of the article asked women to live with it and don’t bother the man with their petty arguments. It also stated that it’s the woman who is insecure and jealous and should get over it.
How would you address this matter?
If you are a man please state your view as well.